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Wednesday, December 5, 2012

Why a Home Birth

When I told people I was having a home birth I often saw looks of astonishment, fear, and curiosity.  I was told that I was brave and crazy.  

My mom had a midwife with my brother, so the thought of having one wasn't a totally foreign idea.  When I was in college, I became friends with a midwife.  We chatted here and there about some of her experiences.  I was open to the idea of some day having a midwife.  I brought it up when we were dating, and Kyle was not open to the idea at all.  In fact, it scared him.

With Eliana's birth we did just as my OBGYN told us.  We got classes through her office.  We took all of the tests recommended.  From a hospital's point of view, her birth was pleasant.

I had wanted to have a natural birth with Eliana.  After 12 hours of labor, and about 7 of those being at the hospital, I wasn't progressing.  I felt like I was letting Kyle, myself, and Eliana down, but I had an epidural.  They checked me right after, and I had gone from a 4/5 to a 10 in about an hour. After pushing for a little over an hour, Eliana was born.  We were elated that our first born had arrived.  Kyle said he felt like he could climb a mountain and wanted to shout for joy up on top of that mountain. 

Fast forward a year and a half.  A friend of mine is a doula, a labor coach.  She invited us to a screening of More Business of Being Born.  I figured that before I saw the more part we'd watch The Business of Being Born.  I checked it out from our local library so that Kyle and I could have a "movie night". The film opened up a slew of questions for Kyle and I to discuss.

So here are a few of the top reasons we chose to have a home birth:
*Everyone at the birth would be on the same page.  I built a strong relationship with my midwife.  Our visits weren't just the last few minutes of a check up.
*My goal was to have a natural birth, and epidurals aren't part of home births.  I wouldn't have to hope that the nurse would support my decision to not have an epidural.
*I would be home where I was comfortable and where everyone on my team was comfortable.  My midwife came to my home for my visits (a HUGE blessing), so she knew where things were.  I knew that I'd be able to move around without dragging an iv with me, worrying about the band on the heart monitor moving, or having a nursing staff change (my 1st and 3rd nurses with Eliana were fabulous, but the 2nd one...).    The baby's heart was monitored, but not with the painful to me (maybe they don't drive everyone crazy, but they made me crazy) bands that constantly moved during contractions.
*Things wouldn't slow down because I had to get in a car, go to a hospital, go to triage, and then a room.  It is very common for labor to slow or completely stop during the transition from home to the hospital. 
*I labored for a little less than four hours.  I know that is not the case for many home births.  I had felt during Eliana's labor that I progressed so much more at home and was so discouraged at how things slowed down at the hospital.
*This time around a friend lent me The Bradley Method.  Although I didn't use much of what I read, I did focus a lot on relaxing as much as possible.  I read parts of the book to Kyle, so he was able to gently encourage me to relax.  My midwife friend had told me a long time ago that the baby can move as needed much easier if the mom can relax.  It is difficult to relax once labor is really intense, but I did my best and I truly think it made a difference.

I am so grateful for our home birth of Natalie.  I believe things progressed as quickly and smoothly as they did because I was home with a supportive team.  I know that a home birth isn't for everyone, but it was the best choice for us. 

1 comment:

Kel Absey said...

wow, Tash that is amazing! Not everyone can do a home birth, but you are such a strong and determined woman! Proud of you!